I want my GAYTV!!!!!

Let me start by saying I am as liberal as the next man.But i have my conserative values too!! I love me some jesus and i am all for guns in the home(especially mine). But on the subject of homosexuality..... I love them! Dykes,studs,fems,faggots, qreers,butches, fairies,ect.. I love them all!!! Maybe I shouldn't use those negative connetations but i gay people in my family, i have gays friends, and just like how Quentin Tarrintnio can say nigger and justify it, i can say those things too. But it is the gay shows that got me loving those homo's to death. I can say my first lesbian love(not really) was Ellen Degeneres. Not the "I'm comoing out over the intercom at a airport episode," but the new dancing one! The ellen degeneres talk show is great! She not only has a black british dj, but she is a really good host. The show is safe for red state americans to watch because they know she's gay but they don't have to see it. But unlike ellen"Queer as Folk" lets you see it, and in detail!! I started watching it because my sister was really into it. Man i was not ready for that. If that is a true portrayal of gay life, then homosexual men are bed hopping drama queens( no pun intended) and lesibians are always depressed and never have as nearly as much sex as gay men do! i'm 21 and felt too young to watch that show with all the male on male grinding that was going on. But it had its touching moments too, I just can't get the sex scenes blocked out of my mind to remember them. But the two shows that never let me down are Will and Grace and Queer eye for the straight guy! Now who ever thought a show about a gay man and his fag hag best friend would be a hit. And just my personal opionion but jack and karen should be the stars of the show. Jack is what i want my gays to be: funny and totally flamboyantly gay. Just how people want blacks to like chicken and whites not to be able to dance! Plus will balances it out with that whole he's gay but cfould possibly be straight if he really tried aspect. As for queer eye , the title says it all: there queer and they have a eye for fashion and they are going to make some tacky straight guy look queer too!! And is there anything better than seeing a straight guy feel really uncomfortable in a dressing room with a gay man? I think not! So with all of these gay life shows does that mean that america is more accepting? No just llok at the news. Homosexual marriages are still banned in more that 70% of the united states. In most cases a domesticv partner is still not intitled to life insurance policies if the other partner dies, and homosexual hate crimes are committed everyday!! But just how The Cosby show was groudbreaking in showing black life in a different light to middle white america, maybe all of these shows will give us a different outlook on gay america and all the colors of its rainbow!!

Dookie Love

I rarely get to watch good T.V. anymore since I work 1:30-10. But there is one show that I never miss, and that my friends is BEING BOBBY BROWN!! Maybe even the best damn reality t,v, show ever I first episode opens with bobby brown asking two business clad white men if they know who bobby brown is? I man on the left says "Yeah he is married to Whitney Houston,and he usually is in jail" Then bobby proceeds to ask if they ever met him, they both say no then while trying to convince them that he is bobby brown he says,"you may not recognize me because I'm not in a orange jumpsuit," that scene alone lets you know that this is NOT Jessica and nick!!! Now we all know bobby is a character in hisself, but it the zany bitch antics of his wife(Whitney Houston) that has everyone tuning in! Not only does she threaten to"Slap the shit out of him" when they are at a restaurant eating, but she gets angry when people try and take pictures of her when they are at a public pool. She even has her own catch phrase(Hell To the Naw)!! But the highlight of the entire show is when booby explains a time when Whitney couldn't have a bowl movement because her "dookie" was too big to come out. Bobby put his own two fingers up her butt and dug it out!! (Gross as Hell) She is obviously embarrassed by the whole story but then says "That's Black Love". Through the course of the other episodes they either are

1. Talking about having sex
2. Actually having sex
3. Dancing in public places

But the show gave me a new light into bobby and whitney's relationship. For the most part I thought they were just some coke and weed smoking music has been who are always doing some crazy shit. Yet they really do love each other! They usually say I love you in most of the show and it is sincere kind of like watching your crazy ass aunt and uncle who have been together for about 10 or 15 years. They are in love truly but if you get them drunk,it the end result will include someone holding their eye and the police being involved,but if they had a choice they wouldn't be with anybody else. We may critize them from the side lines but if we all could be ourselves with our significant others, maybe we wouldn't have such a high divorce rate in America! Now should we smoke crack,hell to the naw!! But if our mate is deep in shit should we dig them out, yes!! But the show all together is a ghetto fabulous treat. Enjoy Bitches!!

Inside Me

Inside me is the essence, the light to everything you wanted to see Inside me is the fruit of all life, and it's juisces that flow so freely Inside me lies the realness of love,the rawness of pain the one thing that makes sun shine though the hardest of rain Is You Deep inside me is the one thing that does not make me shy the one thing that has no shame nor pride the one thing that hurst so good Deep inside me But Inside me is virginal fear, to let all my innbitions go Yet Inside me Is that senual urge to just let my waters flow So Do you dare to go there Deep inside me! Chrystal C. Martin

The Comeback Kid

Okay the circus is over. The verdict is in. Michael Jackson is not guilty of all 10 yes count them people 10 counts of child molestation. For nearly two years I sat and watched this trial like it was my own, Feeling every high( hearing the prosecution say penis at every 5 minutes) to the lows(hearing the prosecution say Michael Jackson’s penis at every 5 minutes) while waiting with Zen like patience for the verdict. But now the reporters have all gone home, the Michael Jackson impersonators have all gone back to Vegas, and the lady who released the doves is probably closing her book deal and selling that cage on e-bay(hope the doves get a cut of the money!) But what about Michael? What can the black/white man/boy do to ignite a stalled out career!! Here are a few tips I believe that can make a "bad" situation into a "thriller" of a comeback! 1)Rep Yo City Ludacris is from Atlanta, the game is from Compton, and we all know that kanye west is from Chicago. How do we know this? Because they represent where they came from. As we all know the saga of the Jackson clan from their humble start in Gary Indiana. All he needs to do is say he is from Gary, Indiana at every chance. Kind of like putting them on the map. Start saying he is from the 3rd coast and make up his own like beef with like Justin Timberlake.(since he's from Tennessee) 2) Become a couch jumping,kissy faced, crappy movie making, really bad reality TV. Show power couple Think bennifer, tomkat, brit and kev fed! Hook up with someone whose name will rhyme really well and look great on the front of the national enquirer! then make some really suck butt movies, go on oprah and act like an ass,find kabaalah and scientology(at the same time) then change your wedding date for or five times before you finally admit it was just a big publicity stunt to promote your new batman movie! 3)Beyonce, Beyonce,Beyonce!!! she danced with prince at the Grammy’s, she dates jay-z,and she finally got rid of those back-up singers; yes people I am talking about none other than "miss booty dance” herself beyonce.Just being linked to her should give you some it factor pionts.Try to make it seem that their would have some remote sexual attraction, and then you'll be getting fan mail from women that aren't mentally insane again! Make another "I just can't stop loving you," or "The way you make me feel" as beyonce as your leading lady, and watch the record sales fly. 4)make a sex tape! Hey it worked for Paris Hilton!!!! And if all else fails....... 5)Die!!!!! Not really but if your desperate for the spotlight. Fake your death. When you die, you become a musical genius gone before his time. A legend of incomparable standards. One of the greats! The records will fly off the shelevs,you'll be in commercials, people will make ugly commemorative plates that will go for $20 a pop on qvc,and they may even give you your own sandwich at the hard rock cafe!! Who knows the endless possibilities!!! perfect examples:Tupac, Jimi hendrix,Aaliyah.Jim Morrison,Jerry Garcia,Fred Astaire,Sammy Davis Jr.,and of course.. Elvis Presley Follow these steps, keep one nose, cook about 20 minutes, and serve chilled and you should come out with a comeback that would even make Cher cry(if she hadn't closed her tear ducts during her facelift)!!!